I was in Nis from Friday to Saturday evening. The teacher of geography let me to go and I caught the bus at 6 pm.

I realized then how Mancha is feeling when he’s going to Nis Sundays at 6. Time is rapidly passes and he has enough time to think about organizations  of his works and obligations. He has enough time to look around and watch the nature he’s traveling trough. I can’t be sure but I think it is easier for those who are leaving than for those who stay and wait. …BlahBlaah

It was beautiful there. So many emotions, so many touches, smiles, kisses, nice words. I am proud to have b/f  like this. I am proud on our love, on me, my Mancha.
I got home late and immediately went to bed. I expected that I would fall into a dreaming fast. But the feeling in bed was awful. I felt vacancy,
like I am ensure in my own bed at home. I remembered how easy I became tired in Mancha’s bed. When I am with him I sleep like a baby.
No bad dreams, with a smile on a pillow, with hand in hand under a blanket. It is magic. Both of us appreciates these moments.

Sunday came and passed rapidly. Then it was time to go to bed. Again the same feeling. I as remembering time spent with him.

Does he know how do I feel any time he is looking at me? Does he notice my heartbeating, eye-shining? The mixture of such feelings that appear in my thoughts whenever I go to bed. All these make me cry. Thats not the tears of sadness….They somehow refresh my brain, thoughts…

I hope that people respect my tears cause I cry a lot. It’s not matter if I am happy or sad- I just cry. And then I fell no guilt, fear, shame.

Trough tears I find way to cope with emotional burst - very strong emotions I have for almost everything. I think I am very brave girl. Many people can’t cry. I cry always and everywhere - even in public. Mancha makes me feel alive. Just with him I can feel happiness
, sadness, loneliness, fear, relief, anger…